Straight from the Horse's Email...

I always say that it is better to speak to someone directly when having a communication issue rather than emailing or writing a note. Emails have a tendency to remove all intention, which opens the door for the reader to interpret whatever emotion or meaning they think comes through the email. It can make for very lengthy email volleys, resulting in a massive miscommunication, bruised egos and hurt feelings.

However, there are some instances where addressing an issue via email is more effective than an in-person confrontation. This depends upon the situation and the recipient of your address, but can provide a buffer of time and space to allow the recipient time to react and think about the issue. I recently experienced an instance when I received an explosive emotional reaction in person, when I expected a very dry, indifferent response. In retrospect, I would have preferred to document the situation in an email, and allow the recipient time to process my concerns. Instead, my words came across as an attack, forcing her to defend and react, rather than consider the situation in full and respond.

It is tough to judge when it is appropriate to resolve conflicts face-to-face or through written correspondence. Take into consideration the issue at hand, and how it will affect the other party's ability to carry on. If it is a small issue of little consequence, but one that needs to be addressed, perhaps it is better to mention in an email. My example above is case in point. If, however, the issue is ongoing or one that may have great consequence for either of you, you must respect the weight of the problem, get in a room, and work it out together.

This is part of management and working closely with others; you have to gauge the situation and each individual’s personality in order to effectively communicate with him or her. It takes extra effort to change your approach for each instance, but will benefit your communication in the long run.

Food for thought...

-Kate