I recently worked on a project for which I needed to compile information from a number of different sources. This information is not easily rendered, so I chose to employ my weapons of charm and politeness, and it got me thinking. All of my "pleases" and "thank yous" seemed redundant and time-consuming, however I am happy to say that I received more information in the last few days than we have in months. I can only imagine that taking time to be polite actually paid off.
One of the first things that we learn about interacting with our peers is to mind our manners. I am even teaching my 14-month-old how to make a noise when I hand her something (I interpret the little grunt as her way of saying "thank you" - awww). We can improve our relationships so much if we respect and recognize the fundamentals of communication that we learned as youngsters.
Please. "Please" is a way to express that you respect the time and effort it takes for someone to help you. It softens the directive, and implies that you are asking for help rather than demanding it.
Thank you. To say "thank you" at the start is to advance your gratitude, which will help your recipient feel appreciated before she even begins. I am more likely to work with you if you recognize that my help is valuable. Even more powerful is "thank you" after the task is complete. It is so wonderful to have worked on a project with someone, and hear those words after all is said and done. Just pausing to show your gratitude after the fact illustrates that you have taken the time to reflect on the partnership, and you appreciate the collaborative effort.
When you slow down enough to use your manners, it is amazing what you can accomplish. Your approach is softer, your request is more reasonable, and you are appreciative for the input. What better way to work together? I challenge you to read through your emails and add your magic words before you hit send - you may be surprised at the positive tone of the response, and you are already building better relationships (think: future favors).
They don't call 'em "magic words" for nothin'!
One of the first things that we learn about interacting with our peers is to mind our manners. I am even teaching my 14-month-old how to make a noise when I hand her something (I interpret the little grunt as her way of saying "thank you" - awww). We can improve our relationships so much if we respect and recognize the fundamentals of communication that we learned as youngsters.
Please. "Please" is a way to express that you respect the time and effort it takes for someone to help you. It softens the directive, and implies that you are asking for help rather than demanding it.
Thank you. To say "thank you" at the start is to advance your gratitude, which will help your recipient feel appreciated before she even begins. I am more likely to work with you if you recognize that my help is valuable. Even more powerful is "thank you" after the task is complete. It is so wonderful to have worked on a project with someone, and hear those words after all is said and done. Just pausing to show your gratitude after the fact illustrates that you have taken the time to reflect on the partnership, and you appreciate the collaborative effort.
When you slow down enough to use your manners, it is amazing what you can accomplish. Your approach is softer, your request is more reasonable, and you are appreciative for the input. What better way to work together? I challenge you to read through your emails and add your magic words before you hit send - you may be surprised at the positive tone of the response, and you are already building better relationships (think: future favors).
They don't call 'em "magic words" for nothin'!
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